Maternity rights

Recently, in a survey by OnePoll for Quality Solicitors, 1,000 women with or considering having children were asked for their experiences in their jobs in relation to maternity rights. The survey highlighted the need for more clarity and certainty for both employers and employees and has been summarized in an info-graphic below.

Even if you have been in the company for a while,talking about their maternity policy can be daunting . Only around a third of women asked in the survey spoke to the HR manager at work about maternity rights, the rest choosing to search elsewhere for the answers.

By law you need to tell your employers if you are pregnant 15 weeks before your due date – although quite how you’d hide a 6 month bump in some uniforms I’m not sure! Whenever you decide to tell your employer, they have certain responsibilities to take so it can be beneficial to tell them earlier.

If you are worried about maternity rights there is a really useful employee guide you can look at and, if you’d like to feature the infographic with a summary of the results on your blog, please feel free to grab it!

What are your experiences with maternity rights? Have you had a very understanding employer? Or was your experience a little less pleasant?

What do you think about these figures?  have you had any problems at work whilst pregnant or considering pregnancy? Are you part of the 42% who report being concerned about taking maternity leave?  What kind of pressures do women face in the workplace?

Finding Work-Life balance

What can we do in order to maintain Work-Life balance?

Work/Life Balance is something that a lot of people have problems with, whether they are or CEO’s or plumbers. In an attempt to not overwork myself and burn out I've read a lot of blogs and articles on the subject and decided to share some tips that helped me achieve work/life balance. 

• Focus on what you can control: We focus on controlling and changing things around us, and because of that we feel we have no control. The only factor we can control is our thoughts, our feelings, expectations, behaviours, strengths, and weaknesses. We have to learn to be able to identify what part of the situation is under our control and focus on that.

• Avoid burnout: Make time for yourself. Eat regular healthy meals daily.
  Develop good sleep habits. Don’t bring work to bed. Exercise. Walking is free and does not need an appointment or up front membership fee. Learn as many relaxation techniques as you can and try to identify the one that works for you. Get a doctor and consult him, at least yearly.

• Manage YOUR time: Learn to manage your time efficiently at work.
  Be organised, try not to over-commit yourself. Accept and recognise that you cannot do everything. Establish priorities that include yourself, and your family and friends. Set and maintain limits. Learn to say "No" Don't try to please everyone.

• Time management: Take regular breaks and holidays. Do not wait for a crisis to force this. Day trips work wonders. Picnics in nice places are a great option. Walk by the river or the lake. Drive without radio or music. Sometimes, do something you want to do, not something you have to do.

• Good enough is good enough: Anticipate and prepare for situations, both at home and at work. Don’t spend time trying to do things "the way it has always been done," or the "perfect" way. Search for options. Have realistic expectations of yourself.

• Make space for non-work activities: Find passion in something else, not related to work. Make it a rule not to take your work home. If you have to do this, it should be the rare exception to the rule. At home, define when and where you will work, and stick to these parameters. Give your family and friends your full attention when you are with them. Look for and enjoy humour on a regular basis. Share a laugh with family, friends, and colleagues.

• Value the time well spent: Take time for yourself and your family and friends without feeling guilt. Acknowledge your guilt, and let it go. See this time as an investment that strengthens you and allows you to be better available for all your other responsibilities.

• Support: Seek and use supports. Make your family a priority. Have at least 1 good friend. Share your concerns with trusted colleagues. Get a mentor. Ask for help if you need it.

• Money: Create a financial plan. Stick to basic principles, and reduce non-deductible debts. Learn to say no to extravagance. Keep it simple.

• Recognition and Appreciation: As humans, we need to feel appreciated for what we do. As a group, you can explore ways to make someone feel appreciated and encourage doing this more often. Some ideas include writing a short thank you note on a Post-it and sticking it to paperwork, celebrating birthdays and special events as a group.

• Dynamics at the workplace: Find the way to communicate in person, go for lunch with your colleagues.
  Relate to your colleagues as people, not just someone with whom you work.

It’s your Life - to balance

Stress @ work

I was reading a very interesting blog post about Stress @ work. I know that nowadays this is an unavoidable fact of life but it can affect your body, thoughts and feelings if its not dealt  on time. I really like this post because it gives a possible solution on how to reduce stress.

Accepting that you are stressed is not easy. Some people think that it can be seen as a sign of weakness and an inability to cope, and won’t readily admit to it. 
However, it's very important that you address the symptoms as soon as possible — and in order to do this you need to recognise the signs.

Psychological symptoms

• Inability to concentrate or make simple decisions
• Memory lapses
• Becoming rather vague
• Easily distracted
• Less intuitive & creative
• Worrying
• Negative thinking
• Depression & anxiety

Emotional symptoms

• Tearful
• Mood Swings
• Extra sensitive to criticism
• Defensive
• Feeling out of control
• Lack of motivation
• Angry
• Frustrated
• Lack of confidence
• Lack of self-esteem

Physical signs

• Aches/pains & muscle tension/grinding teeth (Stiff neck)
• Frequent colds/infections
• Allergies/rashes/skin irritations
• Constipation/diarrhoea/ IBS
• Weight loss or gain
• Indigestion/heartburn/ulcers
• Hyperventilating/lump in the throat/pins & needles
• Dizziness/palpitations
• Panic attacks/nausea
• Physical tiredness
• Menstrual changes/loss of libido/sexual problems
• Heart problems/high blood pressure

Behavioural signs

• No time for relaxation or activities that you enjoy
• Prone to accidents, forgetfulness
• Relying on alcohol, smoking, caffeine, recreational or illegal drugs
• Becoming a workaholic
• Poor time management and/or poor standards of work
• Absenteeism
• Self neglect or change in appearance
• Social withdrawal
• Relationship struggles
• Insomnia or waking tired
• Reckless
• Aggressive/anger outbursts

Reducing the strength of these symptoms is usually a more viable option than eliminating them entirely. The good news is that once that you've identified the triggers, there is so much you can do! (exercise, meditation, counselling, etc.) 
Remember, pressure at work can be good sometimes. Stress is definitely NOT. 

Why London is great to raise kids

I came across this article, and to be honest I couldn't disagree more.
I believe any country in the world has its bad and good points. I am not saying UK is the best place to bring up children, but the worst? That is a bit harsh. 
I am an expat living in London and yes, weather is better where I was born and perhaps people are more social, but opportunities here are fantastic, education is outstanding (and not so expensive) and believe me it is safe here. 

From my point of view, these are the advantages of raising your kids in London. Are any of these important to you?

1- Free Healthcare: If you are a UK resident, you are eligible for free healthcare. I had a baby in London, I was hospitalised for 4 days because I had an emergency C-Section. I didn't spend a penny and the service was, honestly, very very good.

2- Children Centres: Children’s centres are intended to be one of the main vehicles for ensuring that integrated and good quality family services are located in accessible places and are welcoming to all. They aim to support young children and their families, they offer a lot of free activities (some of them require a donation of £1). Luciano and I go to music classes, he loves them and it is a great chance for me to meet other local mums.
Find Children Centres close to you

3- Green London: London has a lot of green and open spaces. There are approx 1,700 parks here. Some of them even have paddling pools for kids, in summer this is great! And free!

4- Rural London: In such a large city, it is nice to have a rural day out with kids.
There are many urban farms that you can visit. Check them out, some are free.

5- Diversity: From school to the tube station, our kids can meet people from all walks of life. Their group of friends could hail from dozens of different countries. And they can try any cuisine. Our favourite is Italian. Kids learn how to respect different cultures. How cool is that?  

6- Baby changing facilities: Most restaurants have one. Also all the shopping malls. and some other shops like Mothercare, Boots etc. There is a phone app you can download that I found extremely useful.

7- Bike friendly: London's public bike scheme started in July 2010, there are 8,000 bicycles distributed across London.

8- Free Childcare for 3 and 4-year-olds kids: 3 and 4-year-old kids in England are entitled to 15 hours of free early education each week for 38 weeks of the year. From September 2013 some 2-year-olds will be eligible as well.
 
9- Pram friendly. London Buses have access and space for prams. Streets are really prepared as they have ramps and most restaurants have a buggy area.

10- In the future, they can study in great universities that are internationally recognised.

Tips for mums returning to work

1- Know what you want. Have clarity on what is more important to you: your career progression, a decent salary or to have flexibility. I am sure this priority was different before having a baby. Make sure you identify a reason, it will help you to evaluate the options you have.

2- Update your CV keeping it relevant to the job you want, learn new skills. There are lots of free/cheap courses on the Internet that will only need an hour a day. It will increase your confidence.

3- Sort out Childcare ASAP, do not wait until you have a job offer, in order to properly interview and get a feel for the facility and the childcare workers. There are loads of reviews online but also trust your gut feeling in this one. 

4- Stay in touch with other adults, ex colleagues, friends and classmates. They might know of a job vacancy and will keep you updated of what is going on in the industry. Do not rely on websites only to apply.

5- Do not wait for the right time. Having a baby, this right time doesn't really exist. Put yourself out there now, at least start evaluating the market. Apply and get feedback from prospective employers. If you are lucky to get a job offer,  if possible start on a Thursday so it will give your baby ease to settle.

6- Prepare for the interview.

7- Don't be scared of full time positions. Remember that if the company wants you, there is always room for negotiation. Plus you can suggest a few other things like compressed hours, working from home, etc. Explore all the options and do not be scared of asking for flexibility.

8- Have a back up plan in case your baby is sick and you can't ask for the day off, or if you have to stay longer hours at work due to an important project and your nanny cannot stay.

9- Time management is key now! Buy food and groceries online. Pay your bills by direct debit etc, thinks that you will be able to spend that time with your family.

10 - Do not feel guilty and be happy with your choices. It is OK to have an identity, it is OK to like your job, it is OK to return to work. Your baby will be fine, believe me.

Do you have any other tips to share?

Good Luck!

Having babies

Having babies

I was always told that having a baby changes your life. They never told me how big that change was. I now realise, it is huge. So, are you REALLY prepared to have a baby?  It all depends on what you want out of life. You shouldn't have children unless you want the experience of being completely responsible for raising and nurturing another human being. You shouldn't have children unless you are prepared for years of hard work and sacrifice. If it's what you want, I assure you it is the most rewarding and fulfilling experience possible.What do you think?